Stillbirth and the death of a baby

The spirit and soul of the stillborn baby and of those who are born to only stay for a short while (be that an hour, a day, a week or a few months) are looked after, at all times, by the ever present, loving Spirit.

The child’s spirit and soul came from Love –from the Source–to stay awhile with the parents. During that time Spirit remains closely connected with them, so that when the child returns, they are gently received once more into the loving arms.

The role of the Soul Midwife, in these situations, is not for the child but for the parents who feel the physical loss. The Soul Midwife becomes a guide–helping parents recognise that they have been touched by a deeper love and awakened by presence of a child’s spirit and soul. They have been given a gift: the gift of love, awakening, and connection.

The child’s spirit came into their lives and blessed them with love–touching their souls. That can never truly leave them, because the spiritual gift of love is eternal.

Sometimes, on the surface, some mothers and fathers may appear unaffected by miscarriage in the early months. Yet beneath something profound has still occurred. Even if it is never spoken about again, the experience is rarely forgotten. A soul came, shared love and returned to the Source. An onlooker cannot judge a parent’s outward reaction nor see their inner thoughts, yet the miracle of life touched them.

Some parents mourn for the rest of their life. Yet I believe the intention of the child’s soul was never to leave only sorrow behind. To remember the love–yes– but not to only see death where life had briefly been present. For we are eternal beings, temporarily inhabiting physical bodies.

During pregnancy a mother feels a connection–a natural urge to protect, nurture the new life within. When that life leaves you and no longer inhabits the child’s physical body, we naturally feel loss, pain, regret, grief, sometimes self blame or we blame others and hold them responsible. But, in those painful moments we can also risk missing the deeper message–the memory of love that was shared and the purpose.

That life, that spirit, that soul of the ‘child’ chose you to be their ‘parent’. They chose you to connect with. They chose you to be given 'their unconditional love'. Remember that unconditional love, that connection, that precious gift which you received was real.

You know that your body held the ‘spirit and soul’ of your child, protected it, but really the ‘child’ held you–your emotions, your hopes, and your wonder. They helped you think less selfishly. They helped you share your body. They helped you fall in love with life.

You had never met this ‘spirit or soul’ before, yet you felt love for them–unconditional love for another soul. Wow.

Can we take that lesson, that gift and share it by letting others into our hearts, by loving others more or in more expressed ways, by being of service to others?

Please do not lock your heart away. Turn it outward to those around you. As your spirit child needed you for that brief time, so do so many other souls in the world. You are anow blessed Soul Mother or a Soul Father.

Mandy Brown

P.S I felt inspired to share this piece again, as I felt someone somewhere needed to hear it. Please share if it might help to bring comfort to others.