Stillbirth and the death of a baby

The spirit and soul of the stillborn baby and of those who are born to only stay for a short while (be that an hour, a day, a week or a few months) are looked after, at all times, by the ever present, loving Spirit.

The child’s spirit and soul came from Love –from the Source–to stay awhile with the parents. During that time Spirit remains closely connected with them, so that when the child returns, they are gently received once more into the loving arms.

The role of the Soul Midwife, in these situations, is not for the child but for the parents who feel the physical loss. The Soul Midwife becomes a guide–helping parents recognise that they have been touched by a deeper love and awakened by presence of a child’s spirit and soul. They have been given a gift: the gift of love, awakening, and connection.

The child’s spirit came into their lives and blessed them with love–touching their souls. That can never truly leave them, because the spiritual gift of love is eternal.

Sometimes, on the surface, some mothers and fathers may appear unaffected by miscarriage in the early months. Yet beneath something profound has still occurred. Even if it is never spoken about again, the experience is rarely forgotten. A soul came, shared love and returned to the Source. An onlooker cannot judge a parent’s outward reaction nor see their inner thoughts, yet the miracle of life touched them.

Some parents mourn for the rest of their life. Yet I believe the intention of the child’s soul was never to leave only sorrow behind. To remember the love–yes– but not to only see death where life had briefly been present. For we are eternal beings, temporarily inhabiting physical bodies.

As a pregnant mother you feel a connection, a natural urge to protect, nurture the new life within so when that life leaves you and no longer inhabits the baby’s or child’s physical body, we naturally feel loss, pain, regret, grief, sometimes self blame or we blame others and hold them responsible. But, in doing so we miss the message, the memory, the purpose.

That life, that spirit, that soul of the ‘child’ chose you to be their ‘parent’. They chose you to connect with. They chose you to be given his/her unconditional love. Remember that unconditional love, that connection, that precious gift.

You realise that your body held the ‘spirit and soul’, protected it, but really the ‘child’ held you – your emotions, your hopes, and your wonder. They helped you think less selfishly. They helped you share your body. They helped you fall in love with life.

You had never met this ‘spirit or soul’ before, yet you felt love for them – unconditional love for another soul. Wow.

Can we take that lesson, that gift and share it by letting others into our hearts, by loving others more or in more expressed ways, by being of service to others?

Please do not lock your heart away. Turn it outwards to those around you. As your spirit child needed you for that brief time, so do so many other souls in the world. You are a blessed ‘Soul Mother’ or a ‘Soul Father’ now.

Mandy Brown

P.S I was inspired to share this post, which I wrote some time ago, as I felt someone out there needed to hear it. Please share this post to help bring comfort to those with whom it may resonate and bring healing.